Wages of Gin - Professor Elemental

Oh dear, I’ve been sick in the sink

You know that phrase is later than you think

Well, it’s later than that!

I must’ve fell on the cat

Laid down, face down on the welcome-mat

Unwelcome monkeys in my head with hammers

So hungover, I’d prefer them to sammer

Dogs look at me and say I look rough

Voice like a lumberjack ever so gruff

Lupi is a groupie, there was never enough

And now one whiff is already to much

I can’t face the public

The mirror is my enemy

Seeking every remedy

… had my tea

Send myself to bed undreadful

Yes, I’m quite a mess indeed

All my friends have left me

All I’ve left, a fuzzy memory

Skibadip, bididup

Skidilibab, dudi

How am I to get home?

Had a little too much whoopi soup

All I meant to take was one

Oh!

Now my head is going loopi-loop

Some stout a kid one bun, oh!

One, two, three four

One, two, three (three), four

Son, two, three, four

One, two, three

There’s a horse in the hallway

The westwing’s still on fire

That weird smell’s been there all day

Someone I know is a liar

They said a drink wouldn’t hurt

But my mouth’s full of dirt

The emergency services are on alert

Someone stole my curtains and they’ve gone beserk

Turned them into togas and gone to work

The kitchen is disgusting

Toilet’s probably plastered

Don’t know why I do this

I’d only just dusted

I need bacon, sedatives, heavy medication

A new liver delivered and a year of medication

Aching, heaving, last guest leaving

I have to get it all ready for the next set this evening

(Quickly!)

(They could be here any minute)

Skibadip, bididup

Skidilibab, dudi

How am I to get home?

Had a little too much whoopi soup

All I meant to take was one

Oh!

Now my head is going loopi-loop

Some spout a kid one bun, oh!