The Interview - Judy Garland

I’d like to be a pinup girl, a cheesecake girl too.

And what is Ginger Rogers

that I am not?

And what has Betty Grable got that I haven’t got?

Oh, the cinema must exhibit me in roles that so inhibit me, I feel,

well I feel just like a soldier out of step!

There!

But, would the episode

outlive me, would my public quite forgive me if I tried to show the world I’m

really hep?

But, now you darlings, you adorable dear, dear boys,

I’m going to tell you all about my next picture… What is my next picture?

No, no, don’t tell me!

Don’t tell me!

Shhhh!

(shuffling through pile of manuscripts on table) Madame Crematante!

Madame Crematante, gentlemen, will be a monumental biographical tribute to a

monumental biographical woman who toiled, searched, starved, slaved, suffered,

pioneered so that the world — you and I — could reap the benefits of her

magnificent discovery, the safety pin!

The story starts in a dark, dank, dingy tenement in Amsterdam, Holland you know,

in the flat of a poor, impoverished family, but of rather good antecedants.

Gretchen Crematante was a very brave and noble woman who, against the wishes

of her father, the Baron, you know, married this young inventor who didn’t have

a sou!

Penniless!

And there they were in Amsterdam!

(Reporters) In Amsterdam?

(Judy) Yes, there they were in a dark and dingy tenement flat with no food and

no heat and no money for to pay the rent.

But did they care?

(Reporters) No, they don’t care!

(Judy) Madame Crematante, she don’t care!

'cause she seen the light just the

other day since then she been tryin' for to find a way for to bring to the

world a big invent, and so she did!

(Reporters) And so she did!

(Judy) Whoop dee doodee, Madame Crematante did!

She toiled and strived and

sweat and slaved, a stretchin' her mind and beginnin' to rave, but the price

she paid was worth the pain, for on a cold and frosty morn, the safety pin was

born!

(Judy and Reporters) Halelujah, etc.

Shout Halelujah and a big amen for the lady with the safety pin.

She really rocks about and gives what more do you want?

Hallelujah, etc.