The Worst Sideshow Ever - The Men That Will Not Be Blamed For Nothing

The bearded lady is a man in a dress

Docker’s arms and a stubbly chest

The dog faced boy is a puppy in a pram

The astounding blob a slightly overweight man

The giant is a bloke standing on a box

Wearing a really long coat

The push me-pull you is a stag’s head

Strapped to the arse of a goat

It’s the worst sideshow ever

It’s the worst sideshow ever

Have you ever seen a worse one?

NEVER!

It’s the worst sideshow ever

The collection of pickled punks floating in their jars

Well it’s just pickled gherkins with fake eyes and ears

A girl with a built up shoe

She wandered in one day

They told her she was a natural

And persuaded her to stay

It’s the worst sideshow ever

It’s the worst sideshow ever

Have you ever seen a worse one?

NEVER!

It’s the worst sideshow ever

The ex military amputee

He lost both legs below the knee

He uses his stumps for cricket

Calls himself the human wicket

(How's that?!)

Lady caterpillar is a girl in a sleeping bag

She looks so bored as she wriggles round the floor

It makes me aaaghh aaaaghh AAAAGHHH

It’s the worst sideshow ever

It’s the worst sideshow ever

Have you ever seen a worse one?

NEVER!

It’s the worst sideshow ever

The worst sideshow ever

A total waste of cash

The worst sideshow ever

Demand your money back!