(I'm in Love With) Marie Lloyd - The Men That Will Not Be Blamed For Nothing

It’s a fact I can’t avoid

I’m in love, I’m in love with Marie Lloyd

(He's in love with Marie Lloyd)

And I know that if she knew

She would feel, she would feel the same way too

(She would feel the same way too)

Her backstage security

Have got their beady eye on me

Whenever I try to see her

I get thrown out on my ear

She loves a boy in the gallery

I know that she means me

I wait to give her flowers

By the stage door for hours

And hours

And hours

And hours

And hours

And hours

And hours

It’s a fact I can’t avoid

I’m in love, I’m in love with Marie Lloyd

(He's the man she can’t avoid)

And I know that if she knew

She would feel, she would feel the same way

(I'm not sure she agrees with you)

I’m banned from every music hall where Marie treads the boards

And now I wear disguises just to get through the front door

And when she appears I try to storm the stage and kiss her

But every time so far the in-house bouncers have been quicker

They’re quicker

They’re quicker

They’re quicker

They’re quicker

They’re quicker

The bouncers have been quicker, yeah

If only I could meet her, she’d see that I’m not some crazy fan

(You're not gonna meet her, her agent’s got a plan)

She’d see that I’m her soulmate, I’m not just some random crazy man

(Marie, looks like you’re gonna have to go round the back again tonight love)

I’ve showered her with letters and gifts and trinkets and flowers,

she’s never once responded.

She’s turned her back on us.

It’s like she’s

forgotten the people who put her there, her fans.

I even got her a puppy,

a puppy in a basket with a bow in its hair.

I suppose I’ll have to go drown

that in the Thames now.

I mean, what’s her problem?

What is her problem?