Smash! - Starbomb

It was a beautiful day

And everyone was excited

There was a picnic and

The whole Nintendo crew was invited

Luigi stood up and said

Listen everyone, I love you guys

You are my best friends in the world

You make me glad to be alive!

Excuse me, hi there

I’m the announcer for a fun new family game

It’s called Super Smash Brothers!

That sounds nice, how do we play?

Well first I’m gonna warp you

Into a world of hate and war

Where you’ll assault everyone

You have ever known and loved before

I don’t think I wanna do that

Oh, come on, it’ll be a bash

Now grab all of your little friends

'Cause it is time for us to motherfucking Smash!

Whoa!

(wait, no) Let’s go!

Kick the shit out of your friends (that is not cool)

Have a blast as you beat their ass

And then they’re forced to clap for you at the end

3, 2, 1, Smash!

Mario, (hey, bro-AGH!) your chode

Has been destroyed 200% (I needed that chode!)

Can’t we all just get along?

Abso-fucking-lutely not, you gotta Smash!

The park was destroyed

Hundreds of bystanders dead

Kirby held Donkey Kong captive

In his huge, disgusting head

Fox said, «Hey Mario, stop crying

Just psyche up and fight instead!»

I’m Luigi, all these bloodstains

Make my overalls look red!

Sonic looked tough

'Til Link kicked him in the stuff

The madness of cold-blooded murder’d

Overtaken Jigglypuff

He blasted Bowser to infinity

With one massive-ass hit

Then he took three Falcon Punches

Like it wasn’t even shit!

Is the time almost over?

I can’t tell, my face is mashed

Don’t worry, Luigi, the clock says

4, 3, 2 (oh no…), 1, Smash!

Whoa!

(this blows) You know

When Mario and Peach team up

You are screwed (you're my own brother!)

Pikachu’s way less fucking cute

When he is trying to electrocute you (Pika-pi!)

Samus (whaddya want?)

Is pissed you got a small amount

Of dirt on her suit (oh, you’re dead, bitch!)

That is the last god damn straw!

Oh shit I think Luigi’s gonna fucking Smash!

Hey, look at me now!

I’m beating up friends!

I have no regrets

This is the fucking best

Yes, I can see now

We’re having fun in the end

Now it all makes sense

I guess just because we smash each other, doesn’t mean we’re not brothers

Ahh, Mario, you suck!

Bite me!