Muffin Man - Frank Zappa, Captain Beefheart, The Mothers

The Muffin Man is seated at the table in the laboratory of the Utility Muffin

Research Kitchen.

Reaching for an oversized chrome spoon he gathers an intimate

quantity of dried muffin remnants and, brushing his scapular aside,

proceeds to dump these inside of his shirt.

He turns to us and speaks:

«Some people like cupcakes better.

I, for one, care less for them!»

Arrogantly twisting the sterile canvas snoot of a fully charged

icing-anointment utensil, he poots forth a quarter-ounce green rosetta near…

(Let's try that again…)

He poots forth a quarter-ounce green rosetta near the summit of a dense-but-radiant muffin of his own design.

Later he says:

«Some people… some people like cupcakes exclusively, while I myself say there

is naught, nor ought there be, nothing so exalted on the face of God’s grey

earth as that Prince of Foods… The Muffin!»

Girl, you thought he was a man

But he was a muffin

He hung around till you found

That he didn’t know nuffin

Girl, you thought he was a man

But he only was a-puffin

No cries is heard in the night

As a result of him stuffin

Girl, you thought he was a man

But he was a muffin

No cries is heard in the night

As a result of him stuffin

FZ: Bruce Fowler on trombone, Napoleon Murphy Brock on tenor sax and lead

vocals, Terry Bozzio on drums, Tom Fowler on bass, Denny Walley on slide,

George Duke on keyboards, Captain Beefheart on vocals and soprano sax and

madness.

Thank you very much for coming to the concert tonight.

Hope you

enjoyed it.

Goodnight Austin, Texas, wherever you are!