Nick Cave Dolls - Bongwater

Hi… Glad you called

Guess what I’m doing right now!

Mmmm… That’s right

I’m walking along Hollywood Boulevard

All I hear are people around me asking each other

«Who's here?

Who’s here?»

But… we know there aren’t any stars out here

You know what I’d like right now?

Mmmm… That’s right

Chocolate cake with ice cream

Mmmm…

Palm trees are swaying wildly around us

And the sky…

Grows darker and darker…

People are already on the streets

Some in terror, some in wonderment

Most… confused

You and I…

We watch the funnel clouds hypnotically inch toward the ground

And upon touchdown, turn into atomic mushroom clouds and explode

A few spectators applaud

Scared shitless, we duck into the Spanish Pavilion, but…

It’s remarkably unremarkable

There’s nothing much to do so

We go downstairs where… That’s right

Nude and lingerie-clad girls are having a pose-athon

Guess what I do!

That’s right

I throw caution to the wind and peel off my girdle

And take my place on the red vinyl ottoman

That stands in the middle of the lobby

The walls are covered in full-length mirrors

You have to admit the scene is pretty sexy

Then, I think to myself…

«Is it politically correct to even be here?»

I mean, look what happened to Dorothy Stratten

Then I decide…

«Oh, the hell with it, I’m horny!»

Just then, Jeff, the famous balding actor

Famous for his tattooed rebel roles

And loose-fitting Italian suits, walks by

He talks to us about… That’s right

All the toys he buried in his backyard

So no one else would play with them

He says one of his favorites is his Nick Cave Doll

I feel pity for the man, and hope one day

He’ll grow hair

Then… I think…

«Wow!

They have Nick Cave Dolls now…

I waaaant ooone!»