Stalker - 7L & Esoteric

(From a distance I desired her

Se-secretly admired her

From a distance I desired her

Se-secretly admired her)

I stroll through the mall

Running my finger along the wall

I just left a restroom stall

Got a strange way of moving

Strange way of dressin'

Strange way of making a, good first impression

Member’s Only jacket, unidentified packet

Sunglasses, jeans washed with acid, newspaper in the back

I also got a dagger strapped to my leg

But who knows what I’m gonna do with that

A sick fuck without employment

Hankering in every single shopping center for my own enjoyment

I’m checking out a girl that’s fly

She’s working at the MAC make-up counter, next to Best Buy

Waiting by the elevator, tryna look busy

So I can figure out what I’m gonna tell her later

First time I met her I didn’t really meet her

I was making change as she was purchasing a peter

I gave her money back, she gave me a look

Batted her, eyelashes that was all that it took

Now she owes me, cause it’s obvious she wants me

I’m looking at you, girl I must have you

Cause you’re the one

You are the unspoiled virgin bride

You are the blonde canvas on which I will paint my future

Don’t you remember you smiled at me once at the croissant tray

Quirky and eccentric, I’m a true fiend

I know her routine, her eyes are blue green

I guess they’re contacts cause they used to be brown

Plus I watched her get 'em at the optician downtown

I’m always scoping her usually from far away

She rides the silver Audi off to work everyday

Except for Thursday she gets a ride from her mother

Or some other dude 'til I kill that motherfucker

Forget the narrative, I’m thinking horse drawn carriages

And marriages, she likes to eat asparagus, so I think

Cause it stinks when I’m hanging out

At her bathroom sink, having a drink

When she’s at the shrink

Yo she never should’ve winked

Now I got her name on my arm in ink

I’m in her closet stroking her mink

Looking for the missing link

But all I find is Pink and N’Sync

She’s sweet, sixteen and good, yet she’s calling me a creep

Cause I’m sneaking through her backyard just to watch her sleep

Rain snow or sleet, you gotta understand

No matter where she goes, there I am, the stalker

(From a distance I desired her

Se-secretly admired her

From a distance I desired her

Se-secretly admired her)

Alright wanna do what I do

Listen this is how it goes

Find out where she works, go online, do a search

Dig up some dirt, put on a shirt, buy some Certs

But look like a regular guy, don’t go berserk

You whole goal’s to flirt, but for now you gotta lurk

Pretend you’re a customer, grab yourself a map

And throw an extra sweater in the bag from The Gap

And keep a low pro, but don’t look conspicuous

And don’t wear that Iceberg (why?), it looks ridiculous

Grab a trench, find a bench near the wench

Put your elbows on your lap and just sit there like that

Nah, it sounds dreadful but find out her schedule

If she gotta close, you gotta rock the janitor’s clothes

And change thrash 'til your knees hurt

Water plants in the short sleeve shirt till she leaves work

And if she’s off at eleven?

Be outside with your lights out and the engine revvin'

Well, I realised recently that I’m getting older, and I, the way I knew this

was that young teenage girls don’t even acknowledge me as a sexual being.

Now don’t misunderstand me, I’m not saying that I wanna have sex with teenage

girls, throw me a bone, you know, how about a smile, you know what I mean?

Nothing, nothing unless it’s to turn to their friends and go.

«Why is that weird guy looking at us?».

(laughing) «What's he doing at the mall?

We get to the food court, the guards there, run you guys».

(laughing) I lied,

I lied, I lied, I, of course I wanna have sex with teenage girls,

(laughing) doesn’t everyone?

(laughing even louder) I mean, that’s why there’s

a law.

(everyone laughs) If no one wanted to do it, THERE WOULDN’T BE A LAW!

(everyone laughs)

Wait, do you think they pull 18 out of thin air?