Music To Be Murdered By - Alfred Hitchcock, Jeff Alexander

How do you do, ladies and gentlemen?

My name is Alfred Hitchcock

And this is Music to Be Murdered By

It is mood music in a jugular vein

And I hope you like it

Our record requires only the simplest of equipment

An ordinary phonograph needle

A four-inch speaker

And a 38 caliber revolver

Naturally, the record is long-playing

Even though you may not be

So why don’t you relax?

Lean back and enjoy yourself

Until the coroner comes