Where Are the Jokes? - Trinity The Tuck

My last name was Taylor, but I changed it for branding

Now I’m «The Tuck,» but, girl, these jokes ain’t landing

Come on, All Stars 4, address the elephant in the room

Eureka, sweetheart, just for once, this shit ain’t about you

Crashed and burned on the roast, where are the fucking jokes, whore?

Now I’m back on the mic, here to even the score

'Cause if I’m gonna bomb, I’m going off like Hiroshima

And after I’m done, you’re gonna have to call FEMA

I’m making money off of my tagline just like all you other bitches, right?

Don’t need no set-up, don’t need no punchline

Just say it in a high voice, hashtag it, repeat it until you hate it

Make some merchandise and everyone will eat it up, bitch

Where are the jokes?

(Um, girl are those crickets?)

Where are the jokes?

(I think you guys are forgetting, I’m a man in a dress, it’s funny)

Where are the jokes?

(I don’t understand, it did well on Twitter)

Where are the jokes?

(Alright, let’s try this roast again, in three… two… one)

Naomi Smalls, girl, you bombed the roast too

Good thing you’ve got legs, 'cause none of your jokes do

They call you Farrah Moan because, actually, pass

It’s hard to do stand-up when you’re flat on your ass

Don’t want Monét X Change, I just want my money back

Hitting all the wrong notes, bitch, my ears feel attacked

Manila can’t get robbed 'cause it’s mine for the taking

Sewed that makeover challenge while my ass was still shaking

Miss Heart, facts are facts, your wig is on the ceiling and your jokes got a

slow clap

Gia, honey, your Snatch Game had absolutely no jokes

Miss Jasmine Masters, more like Masters of None

Latrice and Monét, your improv needs some improv-ment

Hello, Villain-tina, it’s me, reality, you’re perfect in every way,

except your personality

Where are the jokes?

(Girl, I swear I killed that on set, I blame the edit)

Where are the jokes?

(Okay, okay, enough of the womp-womp foley, damn)

Where are the jokes?

(I'm falling on my ass up here, and I have no padding)

(You try it sometime, you janky whore)

Where are the jokes?

(You know, it’s just, the audience just doesn’t get me)

Wow, another Drag Race album, gee, aren’t we lucky?

Just call up Alaska, she’ll do a track with anybody

Thought The Tuck would come in last or somewhere in that vicinity

I said, «not another white bitch, Team Anyone But Trinity»

But who’s laughing now?

Sure ain’t Miss Legs or Brown Cow

They’re asking, «where are the jokes?»

They’re right here, so bow down

I’m Trinity the Tuck and I have something to say

Hello, it’s me, Delusion, and I’m over here feeling my oats

Good God, get a grip, girl

You can’t spell «legendary» without «dairy,» but you can wear too much

highlighter

Put on your maxi-pad dresses and soak it up, bitches, #bitter

Oh, and fuck your feelings

Where are the jokes?

(Oh, no, girl, I’m not nervous)

(Well, you seem a little bit shaky, so…)

Where are the jokes?

(Alaska, that’s not gonna be my narrative)

(I'm just the Gia Gunn impersonator at this point, I mean)

Where are the jokes?

Where are the jokes?

No, seriously, where are they?