The Man With the Skeleton Arms - Toh Kay

Wake up, Flanagan, the bartender’s comin'

He says there’s someone here

Who means to do us harm

Sound the alarm, it’s the man with the skeleton arms

Ten years ago on Hogsback Mountain

The flames was roaring like a lion in a fountain

The trees were burning, too many to count 'em

And trapped in the middle

With fire all around him, was a man.

Flanagan and I was out camping that day

We started our fire with turpentine and hay

The wind was howlin' so I guess we should have known

That the flames was gonna get blown across the land

Wake up, Flanagan, the bartender’s comin'

He says there’s someone here

Who means to do us harm

Sound the alarm, it’s the man with the skeleton arms

Two days later when the fire died out

Flanagan and I went rootin' about

For to find a little dinner of roasted critter

Blackened blackbird eggs and pine-cone fritters

That was how we happened on the badly burned man

He was yelpin' for help and so we each grabbed a hand

Thinking we’d be heroes if we dragged him back home

We pulled, but pulled the flesh right off of the bone

Wake up, Flanagan, the bartender’s comin'

He says there’s someone here

Who means to do us harm

Sound the alarm, it’s the man with the skeleton arms

Now of all the mad people, that guy was the maddest

He pulled a bone across his throat

And pointed right at us

Ten years on the lam from that skeletal man

He’s sworn his revenge, we’ve heard his sinister plan:

He’ll string us up by our hands and lift us over a vat

And dip us up to our elbows in boiling fat

It’s like an eye for an eye, but ninety-nine times worse

He wants to do to us what we did to him

Except in reverse…

Wake up, Flanagan, the bartender’s comin'

He says there’s someone here

Who means to do us harm

Sound the alarm, it’s the man with the skeleton arms