Hokum All Ye Faithful - Toh Kay

Tell me, have you heard the one

About the prophet with the perfect soul?

The heavenly bastard with his own slasher flick--

The greatest fairytale ever told

Weekly he receives

A kneeling ovation from a sleepy nation

They’re swallowing the old routine, the holy saltine

And backwash from the cup of salvation

Have you heard the legend sweeping the land?

They’re saying we all sprung from some invisible man

And when he finished up, he took a little rest

And he’s been resting ever since I guess

Tell me, have you heard the one

About the young man who died for your sins?

You think he would’ve learned his lesson

Not to mess with us

And yet they say he’s gonna come again

He might’ve hit a ripe old age

If a disciple had not failed him

Broken, betrayed and lost, he lay alone on the cross

While the Easter bunny pounded the nails in

Have you heard the legend sweeping the land?

They’re saying we all sprung from some invisible man

And when he finished up, he took a little rest

And he’s been resting ever since I guess

Tell me, have you heard the one

About the healer who could resurrect?

They say that when he rose from the dead

He had a flattened head

Black boots and two bolts in his neck

Hokum all ye faithful

That’s the whole fable as I was told it

Honestly, I’m half-way jealous of the gullible zealots

Who believe this unbelievable bullshit

Have you heard the legend sweeping the land?

They’re saying we all sprung from some invisible man

And when he finished up, he took a little rest

And he’s been resting ever since I guess