Clowns Are Experts - The Vandals

Clowns are neato clowns are fun

Clowns are loved by everyone

Cops n' commies even fags

Everybody loves a gag

Clowns everywhere are freakin' out

In parades they scream n' shout

They’re sad as hell, and they’re singin' the blues

Cause no one laughs at their great big shoes

Here’s some clowns we really love: Bozo, Scoopy, Rusty Nails

Here’s a clown we really hate: Ronald McDonald

(He's only in it for the burgers)

I saw a clown in the mall today

My brother cried and he ran away

They get no respect, aren’t served in bars

No matter how many friends they can fit in their cars

The other day I was drivin' around in the clown-mobile

With 17 of myfriends towin' the

Ferris wheel in the back and

This cop pulls me over and says

«Where ya goin' Bozo?»

I said, «I'm not Bozo.

I sure wish I was, though

The man’s a friggin' genius.»

Clowns are forced to take jobs across the nation

Below the level of their education

It’s hard as hell to make ends meet

With a painted face and gigantic feet

Yesterday I was sittin' in a bar havin' a drink

And this clown walks in and says

«Bartender, give me a tree fort.»

The bartender looks at him and says

«What's in a tree fort?»

«Playboy books and cigars.»

Last verse same as the first

Acapulco version, ten times worse