No Meat - Stephen Lynch

Vegan living, so healthy and clean

So much brown rice, so many mung beans

And no meat, not one bite of meat

Juicy meat, succulent meat

Instead I get, gluten and sea weed stew

Rice milk and lentils and fuckin tofu

I respect every creature from horse, fowl and owl

I’d blow a goat for some bacon right now

Yeah I’d blow a goat for some bacon, right now

You eat your southern fried chicken

And I’ll just have fruit

How’s that T-bone?

No really, it’s cool

I’ll just chew on this turnip root

With a couple chick peas

Kill me please

I’m tired of hummus

And bulgur wheat

Tofurkey tofuck yourself

I want some meat

I respect every creature the birds and the bees

Well I’d eat the shit out some Whopper with cheese

Believe me I’d fuck up that Whopper with cheese

(Whoa) alfalfa sprouts and a red bean

A handful of trail mix

Mmm what a treat

How about some soy yogurt served in a bowl?

I’d rather eat a hobo’s asshole

Yeah I’d rather eat a hobo’s asshole