School Mum -

The way she drives under the speed limit

Packs lunchboxes with a little treat in it

School mum, school mum I got me a school mum

The way she looks permanently frazzled

Keeps me in a state of constant arousal

School mum, school mum I got me a school mum

Alright, stay away buddy, this school mum’s mine

Alright, theres no room for your washing upon her line

Skinny girls with big fat issues

See you later ain’t gonna miss you

School mum, school mum I got me a school mum

I dont fit in in those crowded bars

Going out where the girls drive oversized cars

School mum, school mum I got me a school mum

Alright, wave bye-bye to the city lights

Alright, hello parent-teacher night

I got me a (yeah), school mum, yeah

I got me a (yeah), school mum, yeah

Friday nights are not as much fun

As the saturday morning netball run

Why would I want to stay out late

When I got a school mum who’s in bed by eight?

I got me a (yeah) school mum, yeah

I got me a (yeah) school mum, yeah

I got me a (yeah)

I got me a (yeah) school mum!

School mum — I got me one, I got me one

School mum — I got me one, I got me one, yeah

School mum — I got me one