Losing Myself - Mike Dreams

I guess I’m just living for tonight

Don’t remember how I got here

Lying in this spot here

Wishing I was not here

A combination of blurry vision

And bad decisions

A sad collision

Sitting with one of the baddest women

With ulterior motives

But I don’t even notice

Too busy caught up

Just living for the moment

In love with everything right now

It’s like I want it

Even if it isn’t real

But it’s simply how I feel

Like my flesh is taking over

Conscience went unconscious

I know it ain’t right

But I’m constantly unbalanced

Just trying to fill a void

I need it, I swear I need it

Even though I should probably leave it

I’m staying, best believe it

Cuz in this lonely world

I ain’t trying to be alone

It’s late

And I don’t think

That I would even make it home

My mind’s racing

I’m confusing myself

Tonight, I think I’m losing myself

And I can hear ‘em saying

(No, no, no, no, no, no) 3x)

But all I keep on sayin'

(I know, I know, I know 3×0

But let me go…

My whole life feels like a show

That nobody showed up to

Like they opened the curtain

And it’s just you

No lights for my eyes to adjust to

Still I save face on the surface

Take a shot of generational curses

While voices telling me drink up

I said I’d never touch it

But somewhere along the way

It made it’s way in my discussion

My world moving slow

Like I’m sipping on Robotussin

Double cupping

Leaning on people I wouldn’t be trustin'

In my right mind

But somethin' happens when it’s night time

I mess around and start thinking about my lifetime

And all the bad things sitting on my life line

And all the wrong things happen at the right time

Did some soul searching

Hoping that I might find

Some of the answers

Instead I found cancer

Just a metaphor for the sickness

Of my addiction

Talking to myself

But I ain’t trying to listen

Lord please

Lead me away from these

Mistakes I’m making

Giving into temptation

Me, I’m just impatient

With this complacent life

Maybe that’s why I

I stay away at night

Thinkin' bout my future

Trying to find my place in life

Friday Night sins

Saturday regrets

Sunday morning repentance

Monday, I’m feeling blessed

Tuesday, I’m still living

Wednesday, I start slippin'

Thursday, I’m getting anxious

Friday, I’m back sitting

In that very same position

Chillin' with random women

Searching for false love

Desires for new beginnings

Going in a cycle

The reason I’m going psycho

Swinging in the devil’s playground

Cuz all of this time idle

And don’t realize that it’s hurting

Every time

Was searching for Nirvana, but then

I said Nevermind

Please forgive for abusing myself

I need help

I’m losing myself