IWF - MC Frontalot

I’m a neckbeard when I don’t shave my neck

And you might even catch me vaping in fedoras.

Next

You females expect me to let you on my internets

Look at me, I’m chivalrous.

Step up, lose your innocence

Get abused into bitterness and log off

Think I’m getting piggy?

Well, you’re swilling from the wrong trough

Think I’ve gone soft?

My masculinity towers!

I can sit and type shit like this for hours

Without a hint of introspection or fatigue

You can make a sandwich for me, otherwise breed

And incubate my seed.

These are your two mainstays

Suck it up, you’re internetting while having vajayjays

(And that was your decision

To show up with those)

Why are you internetting

While you’re female?

Why are you on the line at all

Boy, you’d better get yourself together

It ain’t 2007

Your back is up against the wall

Oh shit, tripped over a dick pic

As I’m skipping through the triple dubs

Every dude wanna show his little nub

And call me fat and ugly?

What the fuck?

Um?

I’m just trying to live

A femme with opinions: they’re threatened

So they threaten.

These mediocre men!

They’re in my biz, always trolling

And… I’m stuck in a spiderweb

‘cause I dared to crawl through the internet

I’m not impressed

And I got a bit I want off my chest

And yes, I don’t exist

For your erection ‘cause all of you is a dick

Drunk on male tears, don’t fuck with me

Throwing bows, fucking up the patriarchy

Why are you internetting

While you’re female?

Why are you on the line at all?

Boy, you’re always creeping in my comments

Uninvited, anonymous

Going to get you uninstalled

Once upon a time in 2009

I opened up Premiere Pro, took a couple of lines

From the Scout in TF2 and matched them up to a beat

I go to sleep and wake up to a thousand subscribers… Sweet

From there it only escalated and I amassed

A vast army of edgelords as fans of my craft

And they all thought I was a man ‘cause «there's no women on the internet,»

A classic adage started for laughs that led to ignorance

I made more tracks for mic spammers to use

And YouTube Poops that hit a few million views

But when I chose to show my true colors, I knew I would lose

Some fans turned their backs upon me in a whirlwind of sexist abuse

Yet all those videos remain on the tubes

And I have superfans who badger me to make something new

Maybe I’ll do it for the cool people.

Maybe.

Perhaps

But if you want some more Enigma, maybe you could listen to me rap

Hey Chad, your ignorance is blatant

You got a complex and you can’t seem to face it

Instead of trolling on my posts, you should retrace it

Man.

Get off Facebook, go to bed, yo here’s a blanket

Statement, opinion, and a fact check from Snopes

Acting like you’re educated on the matter, but nope

See you jumping on a thread and steady watching you choke

Post some politics, you tell me to get back on the boat

Yo, I cringe knowing they allowed you to vote

Demeanor grosser than the scum in between your toes

He-man woman-hater, and your favorite word is «woke,»

Selfie mirror flexing in the cloud of vape smoke

Quoting Joe Rogan, posting how you’re #blessed

The next day online talking trash about your ex

Getting in your feelings ‘cause she denied your request

Blahblahblah bro, bro, bro you’re a mess

Well, actually!

Not all of us act as you say

Be exact!

You’re sounding irrational.

Facts are the way

Ladies, thanks for sharing all your memoirs

And all your little femme scars that would’ve been far

Likelier ignored if endured by men online

Simply be us, you’ll have an easier time

Or log off!

Why are you here?

I won’t follow you

I get to be worse than any of you, if not all of you