A Perfect Circle - Louis Logic

I’m a single white male thirty-two years old

And I’ve never been too great with the women

Well if the truth’s being told I’m not much good with people

I’ve been alone in all the places I lived in

But fate had forgiven my shortcomings and brought something Forth from inside

me that guides me when a call comes in

It’s as if I’m blessed with a gift to talk someone into a spell unknown

When I’m lecturin' with the telephone

But forced run-ins: face to face are hella hard

I’m afraid to date, but somehow make a great telemarketer

Cause I can sell Antarctica ice in wintertime

With twenty-nine inches that won’t melt and mark up the price

Might be the fact I’m alone

But most of the human contact I’ve known I’ve always had through the phone

So when I get back to the home where I live now

I sit down and dial my old map to see who answers up

Half the old ones I get the message:

«The number you have reached has been disconnected»

With ten digits entered from another past number

The ringing interrupts a man’s slumber (Hello?)

And that was just from last summer (Hello?)

The change is enormous

And keepin' up to speed is a real game of endurance

I always get some lame little office specializing in claims for insurance

Or maybe the occasional florist

Corner Florist

Hello?

Hello?

I’m sorry, what’d you say?

Corner Florist

Is this a flower shop?

Yes

Oh, I’m sorry I think I have the wrong number

OK, bye

Bye

Why am I still searching, and for what I don’t know

Perhaps a real person or some version of love on the phone

It’s like these ten little buttons have grown

So significant, my will’s worthless fighting off the gluttonous jones

So I chose a different number to try

And I was thinkin' I’d end up ringing another old guy

But when I reached the third line what a surprise

It was the first time in my whole life

On the telephone my tongue was so tied

Hello?

Hello?

Uh- uh…

Is there somebody there?

I can hear you

It must’ve been something we shared in the weird few moments of rare

Silence when I was quiet like no one was there

So unprepared to ever get your voice

I fell in love though I was scared like I was left no choice

But you can expect most boys who get a first taste of love in their thirties

To revert to their seventh birthday

That’s probably why I went the worst way

And devised a plan to get to know her with my voice disguised and invented

surveys:

«Hello?»

«Hi, I’m calling from the Census Department

I was hoping you could answer a few questions of ours, ma’am»

«Yeah, sure» «How many people live in your apartment?

What are their ages?

And by chance is anyone partners?»

«Well, it’s just me.

I’m 30 and I’m not married»

«Alrighty, do you move often, and have your jobs varied?»

«No, I’ve been here for the last 3 years

And, my jobs did you say?»

«Yes ma’am, how many past careers?»

«Well, I’m not really a people person, I’ve always worked in a lab»

«Ma'am I don’t blame you with all the jerks that we have

I take it you don’t get out much to flirt with the lads?»

«Are you kidding?

It’s just as well, men are perfectly crass»

Workin' the plans I had sown to build a rapport

I realized to have her by phone wouldn’t fulfill me no more

So using the skills I was born with

I got her address at home, killin' the calls

So I could see the best match that I’d known

Perhaps it was only a sad attempt to find the nerve it would take

To say goodbye to the phone and tell the girl to her face

«Well, I won’t put your day further to waste

Thanks for your time ma’am, sorry to disturb you, ok?

…bye»

«Ok… bye»

Desperate times call for closer measures

So I left behind the telephone and bought some telephoto lenses

Parked in a car, like those old detectives I watched from afar

And saw that she lived by herself alone and friendless

Then what I noticed next would leave me livid

Her only guest was a handsome guy whose weekly visits

Had her cry, by the time he would leave

I’d bet the guy was an ex or current flame unless my eyes were deceived

I tried to believe she cried to relieve heartache

But this guy wouldn’t leave, it seemed she was liable to be in harm’s way

If I could just sneak in her place I’d find it would lead to a trace

Of why she would keep lettin' this creep within arms length

Gettin' the piece was the easy part

Cause if by chance I met him when I crept in through the window I would need

the arms

I was breathin' hard when I stepped in

Broke the glass into shards with the weapon and tore the bedroom where she

sleeps apart

That’s when a creaking part of the floor and a twisting knob on the door

Startled me — I turned with the gun and shot it before

I realized I killed my own love

I dropped on all fours sobbin' and coughin' 'til I spilled my own guts

I came to still on the rug in the same room

Filled with the stuff I had tossed around and then I found in plain view

What seemed to be a diary sittin' beside my knee

I couldn’t make my mind believe the words that I would finally read:

Page one: «Thursday: five o' three

I was trying to sleep before the night shift when this guy woke me

He had a voice that had a vibe so sweet

It was caught in my thoughts and just wouldn’t let my mind go free»

I skipped to page seventy-four and read a bit more

«The only thing that I look forward to is gettin' his calls

If only I could get up the gall

I would tell him I loved h-» I had to skip right to the end of it all

As for the last passage it began: «Why me?

Where’s my mystery man, God?

How could you let this guy leave

Will all the bad times and depression I’ve seen

This just has to be the last life’s lesson I need

In fact this week’s visit with my little brother

He said if the cancer keeps gettin' worse it’ll kill our mother

He said the doc' said I should just accept that she’s dying

And from the second he left, I spent the rest of the week crying»

Let down, left out

Sad songs, poems, and lies

Don’t get your hopes up cause it gets the best of you

You get stepped on, let down, left out to dry, and you die