Dear Deer - Kate Micucci

Dear Deer

I am writing you a letter

In the hopes that you’ll learn better

Not to go in the woods in Pennsylvania

Cause my dad’s in a tree waiting to kill ya

Just be warned

Some say

Dreaming till tomorrow

That I’ll wash away your sorrow

But I’m telling you to not sleep with your eyes closed

If you do you’ll end up sitting in a pot roast

It’s not fair

Some say Pennsylvania’s sunny

I prefer to say it’s gunny

Okay, maybe that’s not funny

But either way it’s way too punny

I know

Okay

Dear deer

New Jersey just might suit you

Because there they cannot shoot you

But the exit signs and turnpikes are just not fun

But better than a man holding a shotgun

Don’t you think?

I’m just writing to remind you

That an orange man will find you

Sneak up right behind you

Seal the fate that’s been assigned to you

Just know

That your population’s shrinking

And the Pennsylvania thinking is just backward

And 'll leave you cold and mounted on a placard

It’s not fair

Deer I hope that you can hear me

Cause I think of you so «deer-ly»

So I’ll write each sentence clearly

And I’ll sign it with sincerely

Kate!