Self Portrait - Handguns

Ever since I was a kid

I knew that I was different from the rest

With shaking hands and a chemically-unbalanced head

I scared the shit out of everyone with everything I said

I always had the hardest time making new friends and

I still get those headaches I did when I was young

I still forget to watch the words that fall off my tongue

This is the soundtrack to a movie

A motion picture that will always move me

A painted portrait of candid moments

My heart’s a canvas and I’m the illustrator

A suburban family home, a bedroom of my own

A collection of CD’s stacked up next to a blown out stereo

Were the only things that keep me from feeling alone

Like I had someone to talk to

It’s hard enough when no one seems to get you

Most days I feel fine, and others I feel like

I’m dying on the inside, forcing smiles on the outside

I’m an optimist and a pessimist in one

This is the soundtrack to a movie

A motion picture that will always move me

A painted portrait of candid moments

My heart’s a canvas and I’m the illustrator

And if I were to suddenly die

I’d take a good look back at my whole life

Be proud of the things that I said and I did

I know I wasn’t innocent but

I’ve always listened to the pound of the kick

And the strum of the pick telling me that this is it

(I'm an optimist and a pessimist in one)

This is the soundtrack to a movie

A motion picture that will always move me

A painted portrait of candid moments

My heart’s a canvas and I’m the illustrator

I couldn’t paint you a better picture