A Regular Guy - Freak Kitchen

I don’t feel a thing when I see a nude Pamela Lee

A whopper meal with cheese ain’t my cup of tea

I’m a sensitive person, please be gentle with me

'Cos I believe everything you say and take it seriously

I wanna be a regular guy

Watch football and drink beer 'til I die

Instead I read Kafka and write poems that make me cry

God, let me be a regular guy

Remember when you were Gene Simmons, I pretended I was Voltaire

Now I hold a professorship while you scratch your pubic-hair

You can spend a day just watching your sweetheart get a perm

I rack my brain over: which came first?

The intestine or the tapeworm?

I wanna be a regular guy

Dig Quentin Tarantino films or maybe wear a tie

Instead I read Nietzsche and get a philosophic high

Please, let me be a regular guy

Fifteen years old and God was James Joyce

Studied to become an opera-singer, but I always lost my voice

My best friend was my asthma-medicine

I was quoting Ulysses when you saw Led Zeppelin

I wanna be a regular guy

Watch football and drink beer 'til I die

Instead I read Kafka and write poems that make me cry

God, let me be a regular guy