Auto-Manipulator - Crispin Glover

Women are sweet

And girls are honey

But beat your meat

And save your money

I’m an auto-manipulater

I play with myself

I’m a masturbator

I strut on by the corner whore

And walk into the grocery store

These slick pages of their magazine

Are accopanied by their Vasaline

The lubrication

Is for masturbation

It’s high time for a celebration

I’m feeling proud of my slab of meat

I get into the groove

I feel the beat

I’m up against the porcelain of the sink

My things are getting funny

I start to blink

My mama comes, she says are you asleep?

I freeze I don’t utter a single peep

I’m an auto-manipulater

I play with myself

I’m a cool operator

I get back to the groove

I feel the beat

My mouth starts to stutter

I feel the heat

The fine clean girl at the Beverly Center

Is looking real good in her tight fitting sweater

The shiny material of her slacks

Are getting to me

Ok, Relax

I drop a Jackson bill for the looker

She bends herself over like a high class hooker

My face be a strainin'

I just can stop

I’m gritting my teeth

I’ma ready to pop

I’m an auto-manipulater

I play with myself

I’m a masturbater

I’m an auto-manipulater

I play with myself

I’m a masturbator

I’m an auto-manipulater

I play with myself

I’m a masturbator

I look into the ceiling

I see what I know

That feeling is reeling

I think there’s a glow

I see everything so clear

I don’t really know what I’m doing here

I close the bathroom door

I be looking so cool

My mama don’t know I’ve been touching my tool

I’m an auto-manipulater

I play with myself

I’m a masturbator

Ima so happy that I be a man

Cause I got the whole world in my hands

I got the whole world in my hands

I’m a happy that I be a man

I’m an auto-manipulater

I play with myself

I’m a masturbator

Au-to-manip-u-la-ter

See it hear it move it feel it steal it deal it

Feel the — groove

So smooth