A Network Betrayal - Cabbage

Charles Horton’s pay has doubled to half a million

Despite ongoing travel chaos, strikes, cancelations and delays

David McDermott suffered catastrophic injuries, while repairing an overhead

light

But if his screams are heard by no one, did it really happen?

«Well, well welcome to those who joined us in Stalybridge today

Please have all tickets and travel documents ready for inspection»

«Bow down to my presence, and just so you know

I’ve got a CCTV camera strapped to my chest

And I’m not afraid to use it»

«For the next thirty minutes, I withhold the smallest amount of minute power

known to man

But do not make me prove it»

«You've had an opportunity to use your railcard before our boarding boy

And you blew it»

It’s a good job the views across the Pennines will be all charming

But for twenty quid, I’d expect nothing less

Err, not that’s a service you provide

Head-resting against the vibrating windows

And a sense of emotion, which in due fairness, is only offered by the train

A network betrayal

A nation failed

Network betrayal

But it’s utter crime that these private companies have their greasy paws on our

historic railways

Northern Rail appeal to the more seasoned, bottom set maths, jobsworth

Not to tail them all under the same brush

Heaven forbid

Born in the changes and not up for the same cultural perks as say a musical

festival does

Therefore, why should we be expected to pile our excrement upon someone else’s

in the same manner

And give as the power grows smaller

«If you’ve noticed anything suspicious, then please report it to a member of

this train crew»

It is bizarre to know how the tannoy pattern varies depending wholly on how

much the conductor enjoys the sound of their own voice

Clearly a highlight for the blissfully unaware

Who loves to think he is providing much needed local knowledge and humour

I don’t have time to be hanging around Huddersfield station’s lovely little café

I’m on this train because I’ve got actual places to be

A network betrayal

A nation failed

Network betrayal