Oh, Dear - Billy Connolly

Oh dear, what can the matter be?

I’m scaird tae go tae the lavat’ry.

I’ve no been since two weeks last Saturday.

I know who’s hidin' in there!

My name’s Shug McGlumpher and I live up this close.

I’ll tell ye a story. I promise it’s nae boast.

During the power cut, I saw a big ghost.

Naebody knows that he’s there.

Oh dear, what can the matter be?

I’m scaird tae go tae the lavat’ry.

I’ve no been since two weeks last Saturday.

I know who’s hidin' in there!

He’d two big red eyes. On his head was a dent, man;

Big hairy horns, and his neck was all bent, man.

My mammy says he sounds just like the rent man,

But I know who’s hiding in there.

Oh dear, what can the matter be?

I’m scaird tae go tae the lavat’ry.

I’ve no been since two weeks last Saturday.

I know who’s hidin' in there!