Thomas Young - Artichoke

when Thomas Young was still young he was a son of a gun

son of conservative Quakers so very uptight

he would not sweeten his tea with products of slavery

he knew that men would rather be free

when he was only a sprat his mind was quick as a cat

collectin' oceans of detail every salient fact

he saw the forest and trees and every leaf in the breeze

and in a flash he comprehended it all

and he said «hey encyclopedia here’s another

entry on a subject deep and wide

I don’t need no credit I am the one they call

the phenomenon»

upon the back of a horse he took a ride to the north

attended medical school up in Edinburgh

he played the flute and he danced maybe he found some romance

it’s hard to say some things are not written down

the Quakers were not amused by his behavior confused

so at the end of the school year he rode further north

through burnin' sun and through rain mosquitos searchin' for veins

he persevered recordin' it all

and he said «hey encyclopedia here’s another

entry on a subject deep and wide

I don’t need no credit I am the one they call

the phenomenon — anon.»

light rays behave more like waves so Thomas Young would have said

and eyes do not change their shape when lookin' further away

some tiny muscles within tug on the zonules of Zinn

in turn they bend the crystaline lens

that bastard Champollion ripped off our phenomenon’s

decrypted hieroglyphics which he claimed as his own

but our polymath probably has the last laugh

because he’s known for the Rosetta stone

and he said «hey encyclopedia here’s another

entry on a subject deep and wide

I don’t need no credit I am the one they call

the phenomenon — anon»