In Our Haunted House - Andrew Gold

Really comin' down

All wet man!

Step in some place — over here, c’mere

Open the door

All right, no way I’m goin' in there

I don’t care, just open it!

Oh, oh

Let’s go in, c’mon man

Okay okay okay

Whoa, look at this place, man!

It’s cool!

Yeah, yeah, I could like to leave

Looks like a haunted house

Hey, the door!

Uh-oh

Welcome boys!

Come right in

Please come in, you’re welcome here

Mind the cobwebs and the bones

May we invite you to spend the night?

Make yourself at home

Step this way, here’s the living room

Though «dead room» is actually, heh, more correct

'Cause there hasn’t been a living soul here

Since Grandpa broke his neck

In our haunted house

We’ll treat you like one of us

But in our haunted house

That could be hazardous

Browse around the kitchen

Have a spoon, a fork, a knife

You must excuse those ketchup stains

We ate someone last night

Here is your big bedroom, dears

You’ll love the creaky bed

You’ll sleep just fine but when you wake

You still may feel half dead

In our haunted house

The butler is a ghost

The upstairs maid’s been buried for years

And the chauffeur’s comatose

In our haunted house

Our hospitality

Is something of which we’re very proud

Oh, do you take poison in your tea?

Don’t let the spiderwebs mess up your hair

Don’t mind the piano playing with no one there

The crumbling bookshelves covered with dust

One or two headless bodies, what’s all the fuss?

The dreadful pounding, the screams and moans

It’s just a typical night at home

In our haunted house

Things float through the walls

You might see sights that chill the soul

Be sure to wear a shawl

We’d love you to come in

Stay a while and play

Once you finally settle in

You’ll never go away

We’ll make sure of that!

In our haunted house

In our haunted house

In our haunted house

In our haunted house

In our haunted house

In our haunted house

In our haunted house

In our haunted house