Discomfort Revisited - The Hotelier

You carry an illness

Practically know it by name

It seldom speaks for you

You learned to tune it away

But it wasn’t easy

Was fond of your writing

It allowed me to see into you

You hid behind the similes

Like fractal light in all shades of blue

Pebbles and mirrors

I’m just jealous because I tried

Mapping out your mind’s inconsistent ways

Tangled and untied

I watched your ends start to fray

You felt buried from the start, tearing you apart

Constricting the free beating of your heart

I knew your postcard would say

«Wish you could stay, wish you felt the same way»

Asked to be admitted

And they put a lock on your door

Subdued, medicated, face to linoleum floor

And you tried to break away, painted window panes

Bars behind the glass molded to the frame

You saw yourself in those days

You felt buried from the start, tearing you apart

Constricting the free beating of your heart

I knew your postcard would say

«Wish you could stay, wish you felt the same way»

I am

Tearing up pieces of old news

To mend the leaks in my open wounds

Protect your pressure points, I refuse

To press against, let yourself renew

Project the voice that I found for you

Pull up the weeds from the ground you grew

Feel soil under your toes, it’s you

You have forever

I felt weaker when I bent, beaten to the end

Folding on myself, too damaged to mend

I couldn’t hold all the weight

You felt buried from the start, tearing you apart

Injuring yourself dragging from my arm

I knew your postcard would say

«I know your new heart still desires to play

And who would I be to keep it all for me

Wish I could stay, wish I felt the same way»