I Found No Peace - Kaonashi

The devil is real and it’s not a little red man holding a pitchfork

It’s the feeling that you can’t go anywhere 'cause you don’t belong

It’s when everyone stares but nobody cares, nobody cares

It’s the ongoing feeling of

Paranoia and horrible self-consciousness

It’s the humiliation that comes with growing up

And being told, «You're wrong, shut up, you’re wrong»

I have had such a hard time trying to makes sense

Of my teenage years, and fears, and tears

I have had such a hard time trying to catch up to all my peers

I have had such a hard time

Trying to feel okay

At home sweet home sweet home sweet

Home sweet home sweet home

Kick your Chuck Taylors, make a fucking mess

Fuck your Sunday’s best, this is Friday night’s regret

I’ve got my backpack full of clothes and booze

I’ve got nothing to do, I’ve got nothing to lose

I’ve got no idea where I’m sleeping tonight

But it ain’t with you, so I’ll be just fine

You wanna know why I’m never home?

Because I always feel so alone

So what’s the point of laying in a deathbed

If it’s not even comfortable?

You always tell me you’re disappointed

But I know I’m not a disappointment

I’m just young and full of mistakes

I found no peace

In brushing the dirt off for the millionth time

I found no peace

In neverminding your friend 'cause that’s just how he is

I found no peace

In subscribing to the myth that that the way I dress and talk

Has to match the color of my skin and your fucked up preferences

I found no peace

In crossing the street so I don’t seem like a suspect

I found no peace

In stares from men in suits

I found no peace

In your Friday night keg stands and your shitty electronic music

I found no peace

In being myself or being what you want me to be

I found no peace

In my weight, my skin, my color, my sex, my hair, my face, my self

I found no peace in myself

I found no peace