05.30.18 - E SENS

어쩌면 나도 신을 믿고 싶은가 보네

모든 것에 이유가 하나면 얼마나 편해?

모자른 나의 탓?

그의 덕?

나도 나의 적을 용서하는 쪽이 되고싶어 여지껏

그의 턱도 안 보이는 곳에 있었네 난

날 감싸줘, 아름다움을 깨닫게 나도

도둑놈들, 남을 해친 자에겐 지옥을

내겐 어쩌면 선물같은 고난과 역경을

나의 속이 훤히 보인다면

나를 좀 더 단순한 인간으로 바꿔주소서

난 그 새끼 죽여버리고 싶단 생각도 했었는데

실제로 그러지 못한 건 누구때문에?

나의 겁?

아님 법?

나의 선?

시선?

내 이성의 근원은 자연적인 것

당신의 계획 아래에 살인도 포함됐는지

갖고 태어난 것들에 차이를 받아 들이는 게

성숙이라면 난 아직도 갓난애고

주제 알라는 그 소리를 역겨워 했어

위 아래 훑으며 사람 재보는 애들은

기억해 뒀다가 되돌려 줬었지 몇 배로

난 착했던 걔가 좋았어, 사랑했었네

화려해 보이던 그 놈에게 뺏겼었네

걘 착했던 게 아닌거래, 착한 건 뭔데?

서로 좆 같이 굴다가 떠나 보낸

그녀들이 나의 별 것 없던 작은 성공에 대해

얘기한 걸 들었지, 그래서 걔가 뭐래?

질투에 실술해, 질투해

내가 그 놈을 질투했던 것과 비슷한진 모르겠는데

좀 달콤했어

아마 그쯤부터 가짜 미소를 구분하게 됐어

그냥 깜빵에나 다시 갔으면 좋겠단 말과

내가 최고라는 말과 내가 형제란 말을

동시에 하는 것도 봤지, 재밌구만

최고란 말은 받아줄게, 솔직했지 그건

Huh, 의사가 있어야겠어

나만 봐줄 의사가 있어야겠어

내가 많이 모자른 건지

아님 내가 받은 게 턱없이 모자른 건지

나의 죄는 뭐였나 생각해봐 차분히

서로 뭣도 없잖아, 따지다보니 웃기네

지나간 일들 무의미, 버는 데나 신경쓰길

쓸데없이 피곤해, 그냥 침대에 눕지

ADHD, maybe AGAD

I’m thinking too much

Call me please my lady

Love, money, drugs, money, love

60억이면 저기 하나 올리고 남을 돈 있겠지

Money is drug, love, free me, money

머릿속 다 비워내고 싶어

내일 되면 징그럽게 느껴질 얘기 뿐

그냥 최대한 놀다 죽으면 최곤 것 같은데

어째 그런 삶 칭찬은 못 본 것 같네

근데 부러워들 하지, 뒤론 씹고 확인해

Where the bitches go, where the bitches go

약간 미치는 편이 재밌어 더

미친놈, 미친년, 미친놈, ha

I’m a king, boss, leader, 내 주인

의리란 단어는 웬만해서는 안 쓰지

모두에게 다 주지 못해

내가 할 수 있는 건 발라대는 말 따위 없이 보일 존중이지

여기저기 부대끼는 건 너무 귀찮아

요새는 술도 거의 안 마셔

금주법이 생긴대도 상관없을 정도야

차라리 생겨라, 씨발, 그거 존나 볼만하겠네

소주 두병에 18개월 집행유예

다신 그러지 않겠다 반성문을 쓰겠네

내 여권에 찍혀있던 출입국 관리 도장

억울하면 꺼지래서 떠날 것만…

Fuck outta here

Maybe I want to believe in God too

How comfortable is it if everything has one reason?

Is it my fault for not being enough?

his virtue?

I also want to be the one who forgives my enemies.

I couldn't even see his chin

Wrap me up, let me realize beauty

Thieves, hell for those who hurt others

Hardships and hardships that are like gifts to me

If you can see my insides clearly

change me into a simpler human being

I thought I wanted to kill that baby

Who was it that didn't really do that?

my fear?

or law?

my line?

Sight?

The source of my reason is natural

Murder included in your plans

Accepting the differences in the things you were born with

If it's mature, I'm still a baby

Subject Allah was disgusted with the sound

Kids who measure people by looking up and down

I remembered and returned it many times over

I liked him who was kind, I loved him

I was taken away by that guy who looked glamorous

He wasn't nice, what was nice?

Fucking each other and then leaving

They tell me about my small, insignificant success

I heard you talking, so what did he say?

I'm jealous, I'm jealous

I don't know if it's similar to how I was jealous of him

it was a bit sweet

Maybe that's when I started to distinguish between fake smiles.

Just saying that I wish I could go back to Kamppang

To say that I'm the best and that I'm a brother

I've seen you do it at the same time, it's fun

I'll take the word 'best', it was honest

Huh, I need a doctor

I need a doctor to see me

Am I lacking a lot?

Or is it that what I received was not enough?

Think about what my sins were, calmly

We don’t have anything to do with each other, it’s funny to argue

The past is meaningless, don't worry about earning

Uselessly tired, just lay in bed

ADHD, maybe AGAD

I'm thinking too much

Call me please my lady

Love, money, drugs, money, love

If it's 6 billion, you'll have money to put one up there.

Money is drug, love, free me, money

I want to empty my mind

It's just a story that will feel gross tomorrow

If I just play as much as I can and die, I think I'll be at my worst.

How come I don't think I've ever seen a life like that

But they envy them, chew on the back and check

Where the bitches go, where the bitches go

A little crazy is more fun

Crazy man, crazy bitch, crazy man, ha

I’m a king, boss, leader, my master

I don't use the word loyalty

can't give it to everyone

All I can do is show respect without spamming words

It's too troublesome to hang out here and there

These days I hardly ever drink

Even if there was a prohibition law, it wouldn't matter

I'd rather have it, fuck it, that would be a fucking sight

18 months probation for two bottles of soju

I won't do that again, I'll write a letter of reflection

Immigration control stamp on my passport

If it's unfair, I'll just leave because I'm sorry...

Fuck outta here