Damn It Feels Good To Be A Santa - Dan Bull

Yo it’s Santa, put all your hands up

Damn, bruh

This rap track is a banger, standard

I’m grabbing all the ham in the hamper

Sipping cognac brandy right out the decanter

Riding my reindeer about at a canter

Grabbing Dancer and Prancer’s antlers

Yank them about for the banter, wow man, I’m random

Handing bags full of bamboo to pandas

And I’m giving Bob Ross fans a new canvas

Is that a happy little cloud or a Santa?

Dang, it’s the man with the fan club

From Hampshire to Japan, Uganda, Rwanda, Sri Lanka

Merry Christmas, happy Hannukah, Kwanzaa

As-salaam-alaikum, namaste, gouranga

Thank ya, or in Frankfurt: «Danke»

Because having good manners?

That’s gangsta

Got a lap dance from an Elf up in Lapland

Told me she’s a bad lass, and I’d have to spank her

What’s good for the goose isn’t bad for the gander

Ho ho ho is the fat man’s mantra

Oop, that’s another scandal

I’ll hand to my manager to handle and come up with an angle

Like I’m a really nice version of Abu Hamza

Snow hiding my dandruff

Don’t come down a chimney, that’ll land you in handcuffs

Sorry Dorothy, we’re not in Kansas

Cancer’s starting a stanza that’s starker than Sansa

Or the seedier parts of Atlanta

Sex and the City cast: Parker, Samantha

Don’t let them tell you that you can’t, 'cause you can

And if the other kids in class say Santa’s a sham

Tell them: That’s fake news!

Sad!

Propaganda!

People are mistaken in believing that Australia’s

Capital city’s Sydney, it’s actually Canberra

Jacksfilms, Dan Bull, assholes, cameras

Don’t read the comments 'cause they’re bad for your grammar

Reading all your letters and their spelling got me anxious

#YIAY, let Jack find the answers

I invented product placement, ooh, Fanta

That’ll go well with a Chandler lasagne

Now I’m amped up, and that’s just a sampler

Of sounds that I’m sticking in your hippocampus

It is a Christmas bonanza, extravaganza

And damn, it feels good to be a Santa (yeah)

Damn, it feels good to be a Santa