Is The World Strange? - Cosmo Jarvis

Is the world strange, or am I strange?

Is the world strange, or am I?

Is the world mean, or am I mean?

Guess I won’t know 'til I die

Everyone I know, I don’t wanna see you anymore

I don’t even know what I know you for, all I know is that you made me feel

abnormal

And mostly always, all day, as kids when we played

I still felt like I had to try to be okay with you

And truly, I wanted you to like me

Not spite me without explanation unrightly

But even as a kid, my heart’s what I hid

'Cause something about it and this planet don’t fit

I could never build relationships the way you did

So you were only friends with what I pretended

Every day, every minute, and now I’m stuck so far in it

This game will mean death for me if I don’t win it

I’m a coward, a deserter, an anonymous flirter

I had me a woman, but my bullshit just hurt her

Very much the same, when I was at school

Felt like I was from a junk gene pool

Created to be confused, should never have to choose

Between what I am, and what the world understands

But if I never did, I would be more isolated

But sure I’d be hated, so it’s way better if I fake it

Fake me, fake these words

I’m sick of polishing this turd

For this proud little planet, that can’t understand it

But really, it’s clearly my fucked mind that’s had it

I tried, don’t know why, but myself was no help

People saw shit inside me;

it’s clear that they felt

It wasn’t their job to comprehend, so I began learning them

To spare them the expense, I began my descent to the future

Time here’s not like when you’re 8

It’s real, like mistakes I just realized I made

Like thinking people are worth having to suffer

Painting over yourself in their favourite colour

Or maybe I’m just a clock with no real face

Who tried to tick-tock but could not find a pace…

Is the world dead, or am I dead?

Is the world dead, or am I?

Is the world fucked, or am I fucked?

Guess I won’t know 'til I die

And I wished you would be harsh to me

And explain to my face every fault you could see

Instead you were silent, yes, you let me be

To continue the search for what mask you could treat

Like a motherfucking normal human being

Other kids in your club didn’t have masks to bring

They didn’t act different, and that was sufficient

For them to receive all your trust that I didn’t

That’s why I can’t care now about you lot

'Cause from the beginning you never said 'get lost'

You never said 'Fuck off, cuz, take that brave mask off

We as a world have decided you’re just not

What we’re looking for in a long time acquaintance

We don’t like hearing your emotionless statements'

And your 'I can’t play ball with the world' conversations

Kill yourself now, so in the future we’re free from your songs about fucked up

personality"

I always prayed that you would punch me in the face

And shout 'You are a waste of space, get out, my family say you can’t come

'round'

Wanted everyone more than they ever wanted me

I worked for them, worked for their company

'Cause it wasn’t really me they befriended, extended friendly courtesy

It was whatever mask that I wore that applied to their sort

That applied to them so much they’d answer the door

When I knocked after school with my trusty skateboard

And I’m paying for it now, I’m a rain filled cloud

That can’t drop the huge storm it allowed

To build up inside it, no, not a single drip

I can never get rid of what makes me a dick

I’d say sorry, but it’s not my fault I exist

So just kiss my ass, people

I’m glad you won’t miss me when I’m gone

I don’t want to be in your history

It’s just best to forget me

Even if you liked me you still never met me…