Proper Cup of Coffee - Ana Gasteyer

A Sultan sat on his oriental mat

In his harem, High Street, Persia (Persia)

He took a sip of coffee, just a drip

And he said to his servant, Kersia (Kersia)

«Oh, curse ya, curse ya, Kersia!

(Damn!)

It’s the awfullest coffee in Persia!»

«Oh, what I want is a proper cuppa coffee

Made from a proper copper coffee pot

I might be off my dot

But I want a proper cuppa coffee from a proper copper pot

Iron coffee pots (and tin coffee pots)

They’re no good to me

If I can’t have a proper cuppa coffee from a proper copper coffee pot,

I’ll throw you in the sea!»

(In ol' Baghdad, in ol' Baghdad, in ol' Baghdad)

«In ol' Baghdad, in ol' Baghdad

Very often I have had

Cups of coffee by the dozen (Twelve!)

And you all should

Make my coffee just as good

And without this blasted cussin'!»

(Rats!)

«Oh, curse ya, curse ya, Kersia!

It’s the awfullest coffee in Persia!»

«Oh, what I want is a proper cuppa coffee

Made from a proper copper coffee pot

I might be off my dot

But I wanna proper cuppa coffee from a proper coffee pot

Iron coffee pots (and tin coffee pots)

They’re no good to me

If I can’t have a proper cuppa coffee from a proper copper coffee pot,

I’ll have a cuppa tea»

Balls!

Murray Hill 3311, how may I direct your call?

I need you to direct me to the police!

I was just served coffee in a tin pot!

Stay calm, Madam!

I’ll send an officer there right away, don’t do anything rash!

I thought you liked drain-brewed coffee?

I SAID A PROPER CUP OF COFFEE!

Sorry, the doctor says caffeine makes me tense

(sung)

Oh, curse ya, curse ya, curse ya (Balls!)

It’s the awfullest coffee in Persia!

Oh, what I want is a proper cuppa coffee

Made from a proper copper coffee pot

I might be off my dot

But I wanna proper cuppa coffee from a proper coffee pot

Iron coffee pots (and tin coffee pots)

They’re no good to me

If I can’t have a proper cuppa coffee from a proper copper

Coffee pot, I’ll have a cuppa tea

(I want a proper cuppa coffee!)

I want a proper cuppa coffee!

(A proper cuppa coffee!)

I want a proper cuppa coffee!

I’m a little percolator, short and stout

When I get all percolated pour me out

All I want is a proper cuppa coffee

Made from a proper copper coffee pot

I might be off my nut

But I wanna proper cuppa coffee from a proper coffee pot

Iron coffee pots and tin coffee pots

They’re no good to me

If I can’t have a proper cuppa coffee from a proper copper

Coffee pot, I’ll have a cuppa tea

If I can’t have a proper cuppa coffee from a proper copper

Coffee pot, I’ll have a cuppa tea

If I can’t have a proper cuppa coffee from a proper copper

Coffee pot, I will have a scotch