Sir Greenbaum's Madrigal - Allan Sherman

In Sherwood Forest

There dwelt a knight

Who was known

As the righteous Sir Greenbaum

And many dragons

Had felt the might

Of the smite

Of the righteous Sir Greenbaum

I chanced upon him one morn

When he’d recently rescued a maiden fair

Why, why art thou so forlorn

Sir Greenbaum, is thy heart heavy laden?

Said he, «Forsooth

'Tis a sorry plight

That engendered my attitude bluish»

Said he, «I don’t wanna be a knight

That’s no job for a boy who is Jewish»

All day with the mighty sword

And the mighty steed and the mighty lance

All day with that heavy shield

And a pair of aluminum pants

All day with the slaying and slewing

And smiting and smoting like Robin Hood

Oh, wouldst I could kick the habit

And give up smoting for good

And so he said to the other knights

«You may have my possessions and my goods

For I am moving to Shaker Heights

Where I’ve got some connections in dry goods

Farewell to the dragon’s paw

And the other swashbuckling games and sports

I’ll work for my father in law

When I marry Miss Guinevere Schwartz"